Friday, 7 August 2015

The toll

I have mentioned in some past post that I have fibromyalgia. There is always some part of me that hurts, and all the current medications that help with that hurting... well, I get every side effect known and just can't take them. And I won't take narcotics because I don't want to be a basket case that can't function. So I put up with it.

But some of the hallmarks of FMS (FibroMyalgia Syndrome) are the tiredness and also trouble sleeping. And I have both to varying degrees on any given day. I am finding it difficult to sometimes get done what needs to be done.

Like when I have to work (say the evening shift which starts at 3:30 p.m.), and there is housework or yardwork that needs to be done. Plus I have to walk the dog, make my lunch for work, iron my uniform... all things that most people don't think twice about. I can get one of those things done, along with walking the dog and going to work. Because the dog comes first. So I can do some laundry or cut the grass or do the dishes. And walk the dog, get ready for work and then head off to work. But not more than that. It is not that I couldn't force myself to do all those things... I have on occasion done just that when the need has arisen. But then I am so tired and unmotivated the next day.

So, with the renovations that I am doing on the house, plus all the other stuff in life, I am thinking that having a dog is adding a bit too much to my plate. Because everything else will go by the wayside so that he gets his walks every day (he dislikes using the yard as a toilet, and I can't blame him, really). I haven't gotten back to sanding the drywall and it just sits there. I need to get it done. There are things that need doing that I just don't have the get up and go to do.

So I am coming to the realization that I may need to take him back to the rescue place I got him from and see if we can find him another good home. In all reality he would be best suited to one or two retired people who are experienced with dogs that have anxiety issues. Because he certainly does. (That is another issue: his terror of thunderstorms has actually caused me to miss work: if it is at night and I am supposed to work the next day but I spend most of the night trying to keep him from going absolutely nuts, I can't function and actually feel ill if I don't get enough sleep and so have called in sick a few times.) Today, someone started their car on the street and the fan belt started squealing... and Teak got freaked out for a little while. Any loud sharp noise and he has a meltdown. Not to mention the thunder and fireworks. I bought one of those thundershirts but don't think it does much. I also picked up some tablets with valerian root that make him pretty sleepy, although not while it is thundering, but he settles quickly afterwards.

So, as much as I love him, I may need to rehome him. I have some long and hard thinking to do on this. It is not going to be an easy decision.


  1. So sorry that the FMS is giving you that much trouble.

    I thought you might like this video.

  2. Thanks, LX. It is something I have to live with. I try to not let it get me down psychologically, but the physical toll is very powerful at times. So I have to do what I have to do.

    Thanks for the video! That is hilarious!!!

  3. Sorry to hear about your troubles. Like you, my body can only tolerate a little bit of any med and those with a zillion side effects aren't worth it. Hope you can find a combination that works for you so you can get some sleep!

    I'm sorry about Teak...but you have to do what's best for you. Sounds like he was previously abused and needs LOTS of hands on time, which isn't realistic with your schedule. I hope you find him a happy home. (And that video was hilarious!)

  4. I had to look what "fibromyalgia" actually is. If I got it right it basically means payne in the body and nobody knows where it comes from. Add being tired constantly it seems clear that one or two things may not be done, as one expects it.
    I hope you will find a solution for you.

    Nice jump, pure Spanish Riding School, he just needs to work on the landing a bit.

  5. Kate has I know how bad it can be. Look after yourself first and foremost, you need to be good, to yerself. Ok? :-) xxx

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  7. Ack, take it easy on yourself. I had a dog that would climb the walls during thunderstorms. We were given sedatives by the vet... but they knocked him out a bit too much! I think he actually improved as he got older... or maybe he just went deaf??!
    All the best, whatever you choose to do.

  8. I'm so sorry honey. What an incredibly tough decision for you.

    Massive hugs darling. Massive hugs.

  9. I do sympathise. I know how difficult it is when you can't get done the work you want and need to get done. You have worked so hard with Teak but as someone said you have to put yourself first and it should also be better in the long run for him too.
    Good luck with it and I hope things get easier for you soon.

  10. -----((*))--

    Merry Christmas & Happy New Year to you, Ponita. I hope the holidays fill you with peace & joy. And may the New Year bring you good luck, good health, & good times.

  11. Merry Christmas/Joyeux Noël!


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