Monday, 27 June 2011

The sun on my skin...

... warms me, even though the temperature is about 6 degrees below normal for this time of year. (Normal starts up again tomorrow so I'm good with that.) I walk daily to maintain some semblance of fitness, and to gain some semblance of sanity as I go stir-crazy alone in my apartment.

The attention of a new man warms what is left of my heart, after the LHB fiasco that dragged on for so long. I am pleased that he is taking his time and being respectful, and yet he calls me every day that we don't see each other, even though we've only seen each other twice so far.

That's can't be a bad thing, can it?

I'm meeting him for lunch downtown tomorrow. He said he'll even show me his office, to prove that his business cards aren't fake and that he does in fact have a job! It's good he has a sense of humour. He's not been put off by the fact that I have a bum arm, and that I am soon to go into the shop for repairs, and that I am now living on a disability benefit.

We also have a dinner date for Saturday coming, which was made last week before we have even seen each other a second time.

Conversation seems to flow easily, both in person and on the phone. In fact, we logged 171 minutes last night (as per my phone display), so there has to be some kind of a connection. We even spoke about just that subject and how you have to deal with someone you meet where there is no connection at all.

Will this amount to anything? Who knows. I don't have a crystal ball or the ability to foresee the future. I can only go by how I feel... and so far, this is feeling pretty good. Kinda like that warm sun on my skin...

Thursday, 23 June 2011


I've pretty much had it with this year.

I mean, it's a write-off, after all.

The past 5 months have been spent carting an almost useless arm around like some spare appendage that likes to cause me great discomfort at the most inopportune times. Ever try to scratch your left shoulder when your right one won't let you move said arm that far? How about getting into and out of clothing that usually means arms lifted overhead? No? Well, it's not something I highly recommend. It's downright frustrating and painful.

It's been known to cause my eyes to well up with tears during the effort. And for me to swear a blue streak too. I've not yet resorted to kicking one of the cats, though. (I know you are thinking it can't be all that bad then, if no cat kicking has been involved.)

And the year is not even remotely over yet. The best (and I use that word extremely facetiously) is yet to come.

In just shy of 5 weeks, I will undergo the repair operation for said defunct shoulder. From what I have been told, the recovery and rehab is long, painful and arduous. I would prefer to skip that part.

Perhaps we could fast forward to 2012? By then, things should be getting back into a more normal rhythm. I should be back at work, at least on a graduated return, depending on how the shoulder tolerates the workload. I should be not in much pain anymore.

And I might even be able to take up ice skating again. I had planned on that last winter. Something put the kibosh on that plan last winter.

Thursday, 9 June 2011

You know it's June when...

...the Junebugs are out and thwacking my windows with such regularity that even Lila has given up paying attention to them. When she's asleep, that is...

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They are harmless. They don't bite. They do fly but not their steering seems to lack in accuracy. And they can get pretty big (like 35mm in length at times).

They are a fact of life on the Prairies. They hurt if you are on a motorcycle and one runs into you. I got a bruise on my arm from one once...

Nothing new here...

In fact, life is rather dull and boring.

Other than walloping my knuckle on the door frame Sunday night and spending the ensuing days watching the colour changes, that is. It looks rather like a bruised apple right now. But doesn't hurt, and functions quite normally, so I am not in the least concerned.

I went out on a date Tuesday evening, with a man I had dated briefly in early 2010. We had kept in touch off and on since then (he had gone back to his ex to try to work things out, which proved to be futile soon after, but by that time I had moved on), meeting for the occasional coffee and saying hi on facebook. 

I had liked him quite a bit when we first dated, but could understand giving things with the ex one more go. Been there, done that myself. (Obviously it didn't work for me either.) So when we both finally found ourselves single at the same time, and I had finally resolved to get out into the dating world again post LHB, he picked me up and off we went for dinner.

Well, it just isn't the same at all. I have tried to reason with myself that our 'relationship' has changed because of the friendship that has developed in the past year and a half. I have tried to just let things go with the flow.

But I also can't help but think that my feelings for LHB, which are still there but since he isn't there's nothing to be done about that, are getting in the way. Perhaps, even after all these months of seesawing through emotions, of being the 'other woman' for a time, although with full knowledge but certainly not willingly, it is just too soon for me to be making myself available.

So I think I will just draw back and let things set for a while. I don't feel comfortable trying to push myself into something where I cannot give emotionally to the other person, and that is what I feel would happen with this man. That is just not fair to him. He is a nice guy and doesn't deserve something like that.

Perhaps in the fall, after my shoulder has healed a bit and I feel up to it, I'll give it a go again. For now, I'll stick to walks, reading and amusing the cats.

Saturday, 4 June 2011


Given that I will be temporarily incapacitated once my shoulder is operated on next month, I have been taking steps to be as prepared as possible for forcibly becoming left-handed, albeit (somewhat) temporarily.

I have been practicing things with my left hand.

I can brush my teeth quite handily... although having an electric toothbrush certainly helps in that regard. It's rather awkward with a regular toothbrush... try it sometime and see.

I can clean the cats' litter box left-handed, although I will have to work out a container to hold the bag, as I won't be doing that with my right hand for a bit (holding the bag, that is). I've even installed a carpet runner under the box and across the room where the cats walk in an effort to minimize the litter they track across the floor. It's not done on purpose, you see, but having hairy feet means stuff clings.

And have you seen Lila's hairy feet??? Pips has hairy feet as well but not to the extent that Lila does... but then Pips doesn't have the fluffiness that Lila does. Pips prefers the punk look with spiky thin hair. Don't ask me why... But she's cool that way. Lila prefers to fool everyone with her gorgeousness, which does a good job of hiding the craziness until one gets to know her.

See Lila's foot just under Pips' head? That's one hind paw... and that stuff sticking out? It's longer than it looks. She has a tuft of hair about an inch long poking out from between the pads on her hind feet. Pips has tuftiness, but it is quite moderate compared to Lila.

MY feet, on the other hand, are quite hairless...

A hobbit I am not.

I've even attempted plucking my eyebrows with my left hand, which, while eventually successful, did result in numerous pinches with the tweezers that brought a few stray tears to my eyes. I might just fork out the money at a salon for that service.


Because I risk blinding myself attempting to apply mascara with my left hand, I have had my eyelashes tinted. They are pretty colourless on their own and I almost always wear mascara - see above - so a nice blue-black tint applied every 3 - 4 weeks will at least keep some colour, although not the thickening effect one gets slathering on layers of black goop. I do have nice long lashes; they are just a bit on the skimpy side.

Regarding activities to occupy my mind while I laze about in a pain and drug induced stupor, I have now equipped my computer system with a sleek little wifi router. My old computer is now outfitted with four new USB 2.0 ports (considering it was built in 2000, all six of the original USB ports are 1.2... and every time I would plug something in to one, the computer would tell me a 2.0 would work faster). Had to order those online, as my computer required low profile USB cards and I couldn't find any locally. I have installed a USB antenna on old PC as it's not wifi capable on its own. And lo and behold! It works like a charm!!! 

I'm just hoping it is fast enough to stream video, as I will be connecting it to my tv via a USB HDMI adapter and HDMI cable. I'm going to subscribe to Netflix as it's a helluva lot cheaper than the cable I am getting (although I will still keep some of the channels I get) and there are movies there as well. My internet connection allows me 100gigs of data transfer so I should be able to get a few movies in each month! And if old PC isn't up to snuff, then I will reverse the two and have new PC in the living room and old PC in the office. I have lots of cushions and pillows to prop myself up with. I'll have to get someone to rotate the seat cushions regularly, though... I think they may be getting a pretty good butt impression in short order.

I do, of course, have books to read as well, and a library card.

The car situation has already been addressed with the departure of the Blazer and the acquisition of Merlot. The more I drive her, the more I like her... and I am really loving the sunroof and good stereo! The centre arm rest flips up so there is room for my arm to hang down fairly comfortably. It doesn't like resting on things... any jolts in the road go right up into my shoulder and cause me no end of cringes and curses.

One major concern I have with all this, though, is how the hell do I shave my armpit??? My arm will be in a sling for weeks. I can't stand going more than 4 days before the itch gets too much and out comes the razor. No, I won't get it waxed... I get ingrown hairs way too easily for that. Laser hair removal is out unless I will the lottery (I'm buying a ticket today though!) so perhaps I will have to persuade my sister to hold up my arm while I scrape off the hair.

Yeah, I know... TMI... Whatever!!!!!