Saturday, 4 June 2011

Preparedness

Given that I will be temporarily incapacitated once my shoulder is operated on next month, I have been taking steps to be as prepared as possible for forcibly becoming left-handed, albeit (somewhat) temporarily.

I have been practicing things with my left hand.

I can brush my teeth quite handily... although having an electric toothbrush certainly helps in that regard. It's rather awkward with a regular toothbrush... try it sometime and see.

I can clean the cats' litter box left-handed, although I will have to work out a container to hold the bag, as I won't be doing that with my right hand for a bit (holding the bag, that is). I've even installed a carpet runner under the box and across the room where the cats walk in an effort to minimize the litter they track across the floor. It's not done on purpose, you see, but having hairy feet means stuff clings.

And have you seen Lila's hairy feet??? Pips has hairy feet as well but not to the extent that Lila does... but then Pips doesn't have the fluffiness that Lila does. Pips prefers the punk look with spiky thin hair. Don't ask me why... But she's cool that way. Lila prefers to fool everyone with her gorgeousness, which does a good job of hiding the craziness until one gets to know her.


See Lila's foot just under Pips' head? That's one hind paw... and that stuff sticking out? It's longer than it looks. She has a tuft of hair about an inch long poking out from between the pads on her hind feet. Pips has tuftiness, but it is quite moderate compared to Lila.

MY feet, on the other hand, are quite hairless...


A hobbit I am not.

I've even attempted plucking my eyebrows with my left hand, which, while eventually successful, did result in numerous pinches with the tweezers that brought a few stray tears to my eyes. I might just fork out the money at a salon for that service.

                   

Because I risk blinding myself attempting to apply mascara with my left hand, I have had my eyelashes tinted. They are pretty colourless on their own and I almost always wear mascara - see above - so a nice blue-black tint applied every 3 - 4 weeks will at least keep some colour, although not the thickening effect one gets slathering on layers of black goop. I do have nice long lashes; they are just a bit on the skimpy side.

Regarding activities to occupy my mind while I laze about in a pain and drug induced stupor, I have now equipped my computer system with a sleek little wifi router. My old computer is now outfitted with four new USB 2.0 ports (considering it was built in 2000, all six of the original USB ports are 1.2... and every time I would plug something in to one, the computer would tell me a 2.0 would work faster). Had to order those online, as my computer required low profile USB cards and I couldn't find any locally. I have installed a USB antenna on old PC as it's not wifi capable on its own. And lo and behold! It works like a charm!!! 

I'm just hoping it is fast enough to stream video, as I will be connecting it to my tv via a USB HDMI adapter and HDMI cable. I'm going to subscribe to Netflix as it's a helluva lot cheaper than the cable I am getting (although I will still keep some of the channels I get) and there are movies there as well. My internet connection allows me 100gigs of data transfer so I should be able to get a few movies in each month! And if old PC isn't up to snuff, then I will reverse the two and have new PC in the living room and old PC in the office. I have lots of cushions and pillows to prop myself up with. I'll have to get someone to rotate the seat cushions regularly, though... I think they may be getting a pretty good butt impression in short order.

I do, of course, have books to read as well, and a library card.

The car situation has already been addressed with the departure of the Blazer and the acquisition of Merlot. The more I drive her, the more I like her... and I am really loving the sunroof and good stereo! The centre arm rest flips up so there is room for my arm to hang down fairly comfortably. It doesn't like resting on things... any jolts in the road go right up into my shoulder and cause me no end of cringes and curses.

One major concern I have with all this, though, is how the hell do I shave my armpit??? My arm will be in a sling for weeks. I can't stand going more than 4 days before the itch gets too much and out comes the razor. No, I won't get it waxed... I get ingrown hairs way too easily for that. Laser hair removal is out unless I will the lottery (I'm buying a ticket today though!) so perhaps I will have to persuade my sister to hold up my arm while I scrape off the hair.

Yeah, I know... TMI... Whatever!!!!!

18 comments:

  1. Good idea with all the pre-planning!

    Maybe pre-trim the kitty feet hair as well to cut down on the litter tracking?

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  2. XL: I'm pretty sure Pips will let me trim her feet. It's Lila that I have serious doubts about. Will give it a go... it's a good idea. Thanks!

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  3. off-topic ps:

    I'm cheering for your Canadians (Canucks) to beat our Canadians (Boston) in the NHL finals. Whipping up some Cape Cods to watch on TV tonight!

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  4. What lovely eyes you have! (And the cats are cute too!)

    What about a small, vanity size trashcan that you can place a bag in, then empty the litter into it? The can could serve as your other arm. Just a thought.

    Speaking of arms and the pits....

    Unless you're just plain allergic to it, how about going the quick route and just using a depilatory like Nair?

    Yes guys, TMI. But hey, it's your fault for liking us so silky smooth. ;)

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  5. XL: Yes! Go Nucks!!! (Like I follow hockey at all... Hey did you hear Winnipeg bought the Atlanta Thrashers??? We're back in the NHL after a 16 year absence!) Although I had to google the Cape Cods, they sound quite refreshing. Just my kind of drink!!

    Hope: Nope... wickedly allergic to cream depilatories, unfortunately. Can't even use them on my lower legs. :-( Would if I could!

    I'm thinking of using an empty litter container... because it has a lid that snaps closed tightly to control odour... and odour control is a must with cats!

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  6. Ja, I saw the good news about WPG getting a NHL team again! Hope the Meeses find a good new home as well.

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  7. "I have been practicing things with my left hand"

    Will you never learn?

    I have to agree with the lovely Hope's comment, you do have very nice eyes indeed. As for your feet, my my, the camera makes them look so much smaller than they actually are.

    As for your armpits, I'd just go for a centre parting for the time being hen.

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  8. Jimmy: I have to give you something to latch on to... (just like that.)

    Thank you to you and Hope re: my eyes, and re: my feet? They may be long but at least they are slender. I do not have Sasquatch feet. I choose to ignore the armpit comment...

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  9. Most impressed with the preparations! Don't know what to suggest about the shaving, but apparently there are hair minimising deodorants on the market. I don't know if they work though.
    Sx

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  10. Don't European women forgo shaving their arm pits? You can go Euro!

    I tried plucking my eyebrows once and the tears flowed like a newborn baby. You women are crazy.

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  11. Scarlet: I don't know if those deodorants work either. I suppose it might be worth a try.

    UB: Thanks but I don't want to go Euro!!! Besides, it itches way too much.

    As you can see, I have almost *ahem* perfect eyebrows (if I do say so myself) and they only require minor maintenance. You get used to the sensation after a while. And why would you want to pluck your eyesbrows? There's nothing wrong with how you look, UB!

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  12. I do not understand why you would pluck your eyebrows? If you rip them hairs out they do not regrow, your eyebrows do look very fine! Women ...

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  13. Mago: Ah, but they do regrow!!! No matter how much I yank them out, they always grow back. I am not killing the root by plucking. I'd pluck every hair off my legs and armpits if that's all it took to get rid of them permanently! (And thank you for the compliment...)

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  14. If only you weren't so far away! I think I've done stranger things than shave a friend's armpits!!

    The most important question, however -- and did I miss it? -- is whether or not you'll be able to post left-handed...

    Pearl

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  15. Pearl: Hey, you're only about an 8 hour drive away, aren't you??? Okay, I'm not even going to ask what you've done!!! ;-)

    And yes, I can type left-handed. It's just a lot slower. The mouse action will be the hard part, as my mouse is a right-handed carpal tunnel type. I might have to revert to the old standard mouse for my left hand. I have a spare one lying around... somewhere.

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  16. I use my mouse with both hands - no, not at the same time.

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