Sunday, 25 July 2010
Let's try that from a different angle...
It's a hot one out there today.
28 degrees Celsius - 84F for those in the USA - and it's blazing sunshine with tiny puffs of cloud meandering by. The humidity isn't too bad today so it only feels like 33C.
Some like it hot. I am one of that some. Why I live in a place that spends half the year at -40 freaking degrees below zero no matter what thermometer you look at, is completely beyond me.
No wait... I have family here. I grew up here. Oh yeah... that's why I moved back. *sigh* I am a glutton for punishment when it comes to the weather, obviously.
But on glorious summer days like today, nothing beats having an iced chai tea latte and conversation with a newly met man.
Ever heard of eHarmony? The ads are all over tv. At least, here they are. Not sure how international they are. I know they are in (and originated in) the US as well as in Canada.
They do things very differently from all the other dating sites I've been on. In the past, I just couldn't be bothered with their gazillion page questionnaire to assess your personality and dating needs and wants.
But after about three years of time on all the other sites, cruising through profile after profile, seeing the same faces and the same writeups no matter when I went, I decided it was time to bite the bullet and give eHarmony a whirl. Because what did I have to lose besides some cash?
So, on July 19th, I dutifully sat in front of my computer for ages and answered all their questions, inputted my must haves and can't stands, determined what kind of food I like to eat, what movies I like and what books I prefer, along with a list of things I do in my spare time.
Day One I received 11 matches in my inbox. I've put my distance limit on 300 miles, so the area extends into each province on either side of Manitoba, as well as several states just south of the border.
I think I really didn't know what to expect because you can't surf through profiles on this site. It doesn't show you who is online. You just have the matches in your mailbox to look through.
So I did. All met the requirements that I spelled out, plus matched my personality profile as determined by eH (or so they say, but that's what they get paid the big bucks for, right?). I looked at pictures and read profiles, looked at their choices for restaurant types, movies, tv shows, books, activities. Most seemed reasonably close to mine.
On the second day, I get a request for communication from a local guy.
eH does this thing called 'guided communication', where the first party to make contact picks 5 questions from a big long list and sends them to you. You reply to them and do the same: pick you own 5 questions from the same list (there are a good 30 there to choose from) and fire them off, awaiting his responses (the questions each have four answers to choose from so it's multiple choice). You then go to round 2 of questions from the next list, each picking 5, answering the other's five, and reading the responses (again, these are multiple choice). Then you get to write out three questions of your own, and the other person answers in long hand. No picking from a line-up of pre-selected answers. They do the same back to you.
The step after that, if all is going well, is a real live email. And that is how things went for me over the past few days. We each went through all the guided steps and then got to the email stage late on Thursday. We talked on the phone yesterday. We decided to meet on Sunday (today) for a face to face. We now have a 'first date' set for Tuesday evening.
So far, the only real difference between us is I have no children and he has three, one of which lives with him full time and the other two are part time. We seem to like to do the same kinds of things for activities, enjoy the same kinds of movies and tv shows, each have a dog, share a lot of the same basic beliefs about life in general. Now it comes down to seeing if there is chemistry. We enjoyed our hour and a half chat at the local Starbucks (where I introduced him to iced chai tea latte, which is much less sweat inducing on a hot day than hot chai tea latte!).
The funny thing is, I remember him from one of the other dating sites. He said he had been on there but not since last year. I even remembered his 'moniker' on there... said I had recognized his face, even though the photo he had on eH is not the same as what he'd had online previously. He blushed and said he didn't know how he missed me back then!
We had a good laugh about that! Perhaps our paths weren't destined to cross back then, but now they are?