Monday, 21 July 2014

My new man

As you know, I have ventured into the world of online dating again after the demise of my year long relationship with Maart. I was not a willing participant in that demise, but have nonetheless come to accept it for what it is. Which is over.

It takes two to tango, as they say.

So I have registered with a couple of dating sites and have been trolling the depths in search of someone to become my companion, my friend, my partner in adventure, my inamorato. So far, I've had no luck although I will admit to not really searching very hard. The websites fling potential matches in my face but so few even meet my 'requirements' that it is frustrating beyond measure. I am 5'9". Please do not direct me to men who are 5'4". I am not comfortable with towering over my date, thanks. And nix the smokers too, buddy. Absolutely a deal killer right there!!! And how is one a 'social smoker'? Does that mean you have the occasional cigar or one or two joints a day??? Does only smoking when you are outside your house count as social smoking??? Smoking is smoking... you either do or you don't. Period. Doing is a Very Bad Thing in my books. It's what killed both my parents, and I see its devastating effects in my work as a nurse all the time. So forget those guys.

The thing that ticks me off is these sites don't seem to pay much attention to the parameters I've entered for searches of potential dates. I won't say mates, because you have to have a number of dates before the mates part might become apparent. I don't really care about your level of income, or education, religion or even if you have kids living at home. I want to see pictures and I want a nonsmoker who is at least as tall as myself. I don't think that's unreasonable, but they seem to think I am too picky.

So, since this online searching for a man seemed to be so futile, I switched my sights to dogs. Yes, it's been a few years since I had to rehome Zoë the drool monster after I tore up my shoulder and sold my house. She has since passed away from cancer, at the age of 10 1/2, but her second home was an excellent one and she got tons of love and topnotch medical care (one of her new owners was a vet).

I hunted high and low for a dog from the local rescues that would be not too old, not too damaged psychologically and not aggressive with cats. I finally found one. He has pretty much no training whatsoever, but he's a smart cookie and is catching on fast. He's keeping me busy and I have been logging lots of mileage in our daily walks. Which is good. Gets me out of the house. Gives me something to do, and he is a bit more interactive than the cats.

Meet Sorley. He is a terrier mix, approximately one year old and had been in foster care since the age of about 3 months. He comes from one of the northern communities and was rescued last fall after being found as a stray (at 3 months! can you imagine! he would have starved to death). I named him Sorley because it is an old Scottish name meaning 'summer traveller' in reference to the Vikings who used to raid only in the summertime, as opposed to the raiders who came to pillage year round. (He came to me in the summer, and I am a Viking... makes sense, right?!?)

He's a bit of a barker, so we are working on that (his foster home did no training whatsoever but he lived with cats and dogs there so that's a good thing). He also, in typical terrier fashion, is a jumper, a climber and a digger. I've not left him in my yard to find out what trouble he could get into on his own. Lila lived in the basement for a few days before deciding that was just a little too cloistered even for her. Sorley is not much taller than the cats (but he does weigh in at 30 lbs ~ he's vertically challenged) and has been fine with them. He has tried to play a couple of time but so far, they are having none of it. I think Lila may come around to that in the future, but not Pips. She doesn't play with dogs. She likes them and will snuggle with them, but playing.... no. She was mauled (in play) as a youngster and didn't do well with that ~ which is how I came to have her.

So now Sorley is the man in my life. We have twice daily walk dates, and snuggle on the couch watching tv. He's met his cousins at my sister's and they all played really well together. He was not at all perturbed by their larger size and exuberance. He is, after all, a terrier. Exuberance is their first name!!!

If a hu-man comes into my life in the future, you'll be the first to hear.


  1. Sorley will probably be more loyal than any man... and more fun... and hopefully less heartache.

    1. Yes, more loyal than even the cats, I am sure! Not sure about the more fun part... there are some things you just can't do with a dog... and while less heartache, in a lot of ways lots more headaches (at least, until I get him well trained!).

  2. Ah, but young Sorley will work with you and not resent your help...he'll love you for it. Unlike felines, dogs are always happy to see you, even if you just left the room 10 minutes before. :)

    We once had a cat and dog that grew up as kit/pup and the CAT would instigate playing by walking between the dog's legs until the dog tripped and sat down. And once that dog was down, the cat would jump on his back, fluff up his fur and take a nap. They slept like that the entire time we had them.

    Hope the hand is healing nicely.

    1. Yes, he is always happy to see me but, in typical terrier fashion, is quite stubborn. Training him will be a very long and often frustrating adventure. But whatever! I don't have much else going on right now.

      Lila and Zoë slept together, played together, wrestled and cleaned each other. Pips and Zoë would sleep together but not play ~ Pips had a bad and rather prolonged experience in her youth with dogs who 'played' too hard and she got mauled repeatedly. She's not held that against any other dog she's met though, which is nice. Sorley and Lila have already had a few moments of tentative 'might play' activity, but Lila is still too skittish. It will come, though. :-)

  3. Congrats on getting a lively and lovely new dog. It's always nice and wonderful when you can extend your love (and your home) to a new friend and welcome a new member to your family.

  4. Lovely to see the new man in your life.

    Yes, internet dating can be an exercise in frustration. Where do the men hang out in your part of the world? Are there such a thing as Supper Clubs or social clubs? Some place where you can widen your social circle without "dating"?

  5. He seems to be coming along nicely. Well done!

  6. Okay, Sorely. You don't bite me - I don't bite you. And all is fine.

  7. Condolences on the passing of Zoë.

    Congrats on finding Sorley. Raised with cats is a definite plus that should get him settled in with the girls.

    PS: Interactive cats? Siamese! hehehe!


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