Invasion

Okay, I lied when I said there was nothing new... but I didn't know then... didn't know until I got the call late last night after I got home from work... my phone never rings at 12:30 a.m. My heart jumped when it rang... and rightly so, it turns out.

Debbie is my oldest and bestest friend. We have been best buds for 36 1/2 years. She now lives in Texas.... far south from here... nursing in warmer climes.... has been down there for almost 17 years.

She called me last night. I haven't been able to talk to her for a week, as she was in California visiting her daughter who is in the Coast Guard. They had a family trip out to sea on the ship the Coasties work on. So she was incommunicado for a while. I had emailed her and called her home but got nothing back until last night.

Debbie called me... to tell me she has cancer. Bladder cancer. Her dad died of bladder cancer. Up here in Canada, where the health care system crawls at a snail's pace. Down there in Texas, it is much faster... roadrunner speed.

So she has already had a CT scan and bloodwork done and goes in on Monday for surgery to have it scraped out and sent for biopsy. She may need radiation therapy. She may need chemo.

The level of invasion is unknown until they get in there and see it. If it is superficial, the prognosis is good - but how deep it goes into the layers of the bladder determines how deadly it is.

I can only hope it is early and being caught before it burrows deep. I can only hope that my best friend in the universe... my soul sister... will survive to grow old with me.

I am terrified for her. She is so scared! Talking last night, her voice kept breaking and I was trying so hard to not lose it myself. I need to be strong for her. Her husband is a doll and is there for her, totally. But her two daughters (21 and 19) are nonchalant - they are in denial and really don't understand the situation, I don't think. And that hurts her.... like they don't care.... but I don't think they comprehend that she could die.

I do... I know only too well about that. I am terrified for me as well. I don't want to lose another person that I love.... there have too many losses in this lifetime already.